Jul 293 min read

Needed Some Sun!

There’s a TikTok sound right now that says “Oh! I wasn’t sad… I just needed some sun!” and all I have to say to that is amen. I have been cooped up in my apartment because it’s (literally) hot as hell outside and I can’t bring myself to move much. Even if I wake up at sunrise it’s too hot to function. So I’ve been at home, sitting in front of my fan, reading a lot, working out a little, and trying to learn Italian. It’s been thrilling.

This week was good, and I’m happy, but sometimes you just need a good cry, and this week I’ve cried quite a bit. A few of my close friends are going through tough times and I’m sad for them, I’m rereading a favorite book series and have cried an average of 4 times per book (there’s nothing better than a book cry though), my sweet dog passed away (he was 15 and lived a good life, but still sad), I watched an old clip of Steve Irwin the crocodile hunter talking about his kids, I read a Isaiah 38:17 and was reminded of how much God loves us, and I listened to a new album by a musician I like. Some tears were happy and some were sad and some were silly and stupid, but like I said, sometimes you just need a good cry! Or 12!

My cousin Jenna and I were talking about how weird it is to have seasonal depression in the summer, because growing up in western Washington summer was the best time of the year. It was never too hot, and if it was we were ten minutes away from a body of water to float in. It’s a little different when you live in a concrete jungle and it’s nearly 100 degrees!

Yesterday was the first day in weeks that I spent fully outside, and what a gamechanger that was! A few friends and I left town at 5:30 and headed to the Ligurian sea. When we got to Spotorno, we went to a focacceria and bought an insane amount of bread. We swam for hours (the water is so salty you hardly have to tread water in order to float). We rented some kayaks and paddled out to a little island where we docked and spent way too much time jumping off a rock or using a little rope swing. After paddling a bit more we headed back to the beach and laid in the sun, then had a picnic with the best tuna sandwiches I’ve ever tasted.

It was one of those “pinch me” moments. How is this my life? That the sea is driving distance away and I’m swimming in it with friends?! My goodness. Sun and saltwater can fix almost everything.

Today I hurt all over in the best way. My skin is burnt to a crisp, my feet are raw from climbing barnacle-covered rocks, and my arms are sore from kayaking and swimming. I feel how I did as a kid in the summer, but there’s nothing better than the full body exhaustion that comes from a day in the sea and the sunshine.

Turns out, I just needed some sun!